Gents & Dames
Twenty: Finale
David left for work with a spring in his step, surprising even himself. It was a beautiful, sunny morning out, the library would be open to the public for the first time, and the dedication had almost definitely made it on to the front page. His sister was happy, his friends were happy, and he was happy for them. Life was on the verge of returning to normal, which he was certainly looking forward to.
He stopped to buy a paper from his usual newsboy -- Scrap? Scamp? Something like that. A glance at the headline provided a mild letdown: there was something about a police bust above the fold, though President Taft in all his corpulent glory looked out from below. "Sorry, Mr. Jacobs," the boy said. "It's a great headline, though."
"Ah, well. Below the fold is still front page," David answered, and handed him the usual nickel, then hurried off towards work before the kid even bothered to lie about having change.
There were already people gawking at the statues outside the library when he arrived, almost an hour before the building opened. There was work to do, of course, but nearly everything was in place. He actually had a few minutes to relax, so he waved to the few other people inside preparing and headed to his office.
He had a moment of hesitation when he walked in, remembering the sight of Jack leaving, slouched and defeated. But he took a deep breath, dropped the paper on his desk, and pulled the curtains open. The sunlight dispelled the memories and his uncertainty. This was where he belonged, and it was better to be lonely on occasion than to put his faith in someone who had never been -- probably could never be -- reliable.
He settled at his desk to read his paper while it was still calm enough to do so. Any doubt that the library would be popular among even the common New Yorker had vanished when he'd seen the crowd outside, so this was likely his last chance for calm before it became a madhouse.
The newsboy was right, there was a fantastic headline: "Corrupt Cop Arrested in Gambling Ring Shootout, 3 Wounded." It would be more dramatic if someone had died, but David couldn't wish that on anyone, not even a dirty cop.
He only glanced at the article before looking down to see the story about the library, but something caught his eye and he looked again. There it was: "Walter 'Jonesy' Jones." And, "Lieutenant Leonard Brannigan."
He read in earnest: a tip had led Mayor Gaynor to have top detectives look into a possible corrupt cop -- Brannigan. David nodded along; he knew full well that Brannigan was at least taking bribes from Jonesy, if not actually helping him shake down competition. So someone had tipped off Gaynor, there had been a sting set up quickly -- before Brannigan could catch word of it -- and it had ended up with a shootout when the cops had come in to try and break up the gambling ring. Brannigan had been caught red-handed, and Jonesy was among the wounded. He awaited trail under a doctor's care, but since the other two serious injuries had come to cops, chances were good he was looking at jail for life. Same for Brannigan.
David actually found himself sighing with relief at the thought of Brannigan and Jonesy out of his hair -- and Nathan's and Adelaide's. Thank god someone had tipped off the Gaynor that Brannigan wasn't so trustworthy after all. Though the article didn't say who, since it was obviously hastily-written to try and get a sudden event in before the morning print deadline.
He reread the intro again and paused, reconsidering. No, the tipster wasn't left out because of the rush job; the source was anonymous. Or more specifically, it said, "an anonymous recent friend of the mayor."
Anonymous recent friend. Someone he'd just met, and someone who knew about Brannigan and Jonesy. David dropped the paper and buried his head in his hands.
Going after Jack was absolutely the wrong thing to do. David knew that. Jack was utterly unreliable, and a liar besides. Except...
Except that David had always known that for all his mistakes, Jack would truly strive to set things right.
"Damn him," he muttered aloud, as he reached for the train ticket that still sat on his desk.
*
Jack slouched in his seat, pulled his hat down as far as it would go, and crossed his arms. The train would pull out in a matter of minutes, and the seat next to his was vacant. Not that he'd really, honestly expected David to show up, but damn it, after that kiss... There was no way David hadn't felt something. Jack was sure of that.
His confession had been too little, too late, he supposed. Ten years too late, at least. Jack knew he had no one to blame but himself, and that going to see David at the library had been a long shot at best. A small part of him was glad he'd gone anyway, relieved to finally have confronted the truth, but mostly he felt the emptiness of the seat next to him and knew he'd always feel it. It may have taken him a decade to realize it, but David made him whole.
Since he'd been out west, he'd had the fantasy of reconciliation to help fill what lacked in his life. Now he had nothing but the memory of one single kiss and the look of shock on David's face. And while he'd remember that kiss until his dying day, he knew he'd never be able to think of it without aching for David.
He shut his eyes, figuring he could doze for a few hours before he needed to stretch his legs. Hopefully it would keep people from bothering him -- especially Mr. Dawes, who sat at the back of the train car and had given him a dirty look on his way past. He'd wander up to scold Jack soon enough, and probably help himself to the seat meant for David.
Now Jack was just depressing himself. He sighed.
"Hey, mister, buy a pape? Says here that the mayor got shot at a gambling den."
Jack snapped his head around so sharply his hat fell off.
David smirked down at him, holding out a copy of the hours-old morning edition.
Jack gaped.
"I think that's my seat?" David asked.
Jack nodded.
David sat, folded the paper, and glanced at him with eyebrows raised. "Never seen you speechless before," he noted.
"You're here," Jack managed.
"Against my better judgment, yes."
"David..."
"Hmm?"
Jack shrugged, wordless. He could only smile and reach for David's hand, a substitute for what he truly wanted, which was to pull David close, to kiss him for hours, to never let go. David looked down at their hands, cleared his throat, and pulled his away.
Jack's heart sank a little bit.
"This wasn't an easy choice," David finally said. "I have a life in New York, you know."
"I know," Jack said softly.
"And my job. You realize I won't even get to see my library in use? And I had to resign without even the decency of giving the rest of the Library Committee advance notice. And my apartment -- it's lucky for you Les wanted somewhere larger with the baby coming, and that he was happy to take my place." He hesitated. "My mother is pretty thrilled to have Joseph in the apartment, but even so."
Jack nodded.
"I hardly had a chance to pack; I've got three suits, a nightshirt, and a pillow, and that's about it. My folks will have to ship me everything else I own. And I barely got to say goodbye to anyone. Which is actually important to me."
"David, I'm sorry," Jack said. "I didn't want this to -- No, that's not true." He started again: "I wanted you to come with me and I didn't think about how hard it would be for you. And I'm sorry it was hard but I'm grateful that you're here."
David gave him the ghost of a smile. "I appreciate the honesty."
The train began to pull away from the station. David clenched the armrest tightly, his knuckles going white. Jack brushed his hand against David's, hoping to offer some reassurance -- David had probably never even been out of the city before, and now he was heading all the way across the country.
And he was doing it for Jack.
"David... I... Thank you," Jack murmured. "I'm so grateful you're here. I can't even believe... I love you so much."
David glanced over at him but didn't say anything.
"Do you..." Jack trailed off. It was a stupid question. Obviously David felt something for him, or he wouldn't have come, and asking it sounded so desperate.
David made an amused noise and turned towards him. "You want to know how I feel?" he surmised. Jack nodded. "Well. Too bad, because I don't think I'm going to tell you. I'll leave you to wonder and worry and think I don't care, and assume that I showed up on the train because I was interested in taking a job. And I'm going to let you think that with no indication whatsoever that it might be wrong for, oh -- let's say ten years." David glowered. "And then maybe I'll be kind enough to turn your life upside down and tell you the truth."
"So you're still mad at me?"
"You figured that out?"
"But you're here," Jack said. "I'll wait as long as you want." He paused. "But I have a better idea, I think. A deal."
"Oh?" David raised an eyebrow.
"Mm. You tell me how you feel now, and I'll spend the rest of my life making up for the last ten years."
"Hmm." David tipped his head back and tapped a finger against the armrest, considering.
"And," Jack continued quickly, "I promise never to lie."
"Ha," David muttered, but he gave Jack a slightly less hesitant smile. "Keep going."
"Uh, okay. How about, once we get to my house, I promise that every Saturday, I'll bring you breakfast in bed? And wash the sheets to clean out any crumbs."
David chuckled. Jack's heartbeat sped up just hearing it.
"And, let's see, oh! My granddad has this cabin on a lake out in New Mexico, and it's beautiful. Every summer, I promise I'll take you out there, and it'll be just you and me for a few weeks. Or -- or we could travel. Anywhere in the world you want to go, I'll take you there."
"Hmm."
"And... I'll build you a library."
"With your own two hands?"
"If that's what you want," Jack said. "I'll pour the foundation and lay the bricks myself."
David laughed. "How could I turn that down? But I'm holding you to it."
"Building you a library brick-by-brick?"
"Never lying to me." David paused. "And breakfast in bed."
"More than fair."
"You want to spit shake?" David laughed again. "Jack, it's going to be a long time before I can really trust you, but... I love you. I want to take this risk and I want to be with you. Or I wouldn't be here."
Jack reached for David's hand again, and this time he didn't pull away -- David turned his hand so their fingers interlocked, and he smiled.
"Wish I could kiss you," Jack said quietly, leaning forward so he was closer to David.
"Don't worry," David said. "We'll have years for that."
Jack let that sink in and relaxed into his seat, David's hand still held in his own. He could feel David sink back in the seat next to him, taking a deep breath.
"So, California," David said eventually.
"Home," Jack said.
David squeezed his hand. "Home," he agreed.
Fin.